Be careful with how you treat the monsters inside you. We all have them. Those voices, those parts of us that feel brutal, unloving harsh and cold.
Many people think the best way to get rid of them is to fight them, to enter a battle. To come into opposition to them. Not at all.
Actually, when we become preoccupied with fighting these monsters, we become those very monsters ourselves. This explanation is that we become lost in the process, because by constantly trying to fight something we begin to identify with all its tactics, behaviours, features. We become accustomed to its ways. We know it so well, we learn from it exactly how to be like it. We become desensitised in the process, not knowing we’ve become the monster.
It’s a similar thing to war. When soldiers are in war, they become accustomed to the brutal ways of fighting what they’re told are ‘monsters’ (the ‘enemy’) against them. They become so focused on that ‘enemy’, they eventually adopt the behaviours of the ‘monster’ - brutality.
Do not fight. Confront them.
Fighting and confronting are different. When we confront our monsters within us, this comes with bravery, courage and softness. We want to understand our monsters, show curiosity for why they’re there, what they want from us, and if we can sit on the same table without fighting. When we confront them, we know we are nothing like them. We are not used up by our energy to try and figure out how to get rid of them. We rather want to empathise and have compassion for them.
The part of you that criticises you. That’s an example of your monster. Speak to it. Sense it, where is it in your body? What does it feel like? What does it look like? Can you give it a shape, colour, temperature? Then start a dialogue with it. First recognise it. Tell the part, I can feel you’re here. Ask questions. What is your purpose? Why are you here? What are you trying to tell me? What are you trying to protect me from?
Show curiosity to those monsters within. They want your attention, not to be fought off. And do so with compassion. Otherwise, you run the risk of becoming that very monster itself.